ok! wat a morning!
jst came back frm breakfast wit cheltton.
omg. we have no life lahh. ): hahahas.
gonna go out wit izzati later.
and then.. MOVIE! wit... hahas. (:

i'm tired of putting up a strong front. cos when there's too much going on you just cant do it all the time. i've so many things on my mind but i know im not the only wit it. so i keep it to myself first and try my best to not make others affected.

to you:
who's always been there for me this yr. it feels weird not having you ard. i cannot say that i'm ok and that i dun need you at all. cos thats utterly a lie. i wish i didnt have to go to shanghai if this was wat i have to go through. i know its unfair to you. even more unfair if you really knew wat happen there. cos it was utterly wrong for me to even do it. but, when i was there, i thought so much about you, us and myself. where did both of us stand in each others heart. it wasnt easy to bring myself to reality and assure myself that i too have no more feelings for you. but, the memories have been so beautiful. but it was a vulnerable one. i dun cry for u anymore i just miss the times. the fun. the joy. i really do. i still tire myself till today cos i refuse to tink abt all those times. i've been sleeping so late and waking up so late too cos i know i dun haf to think of u half the time. i'm still waiting for ur PROMISE to happen. you PROMISE and you have 2 DAYS left. cheltton told me to wait. i will. but if u dun fulfill it den f*** you. i feel so defenseless. even dat day, after talking to someone who was close to BOTH IF US, we cant find a reason for ur change. "its not like him to be rude." thats wat we agree on. but... ): i wish you communicate more and you'd have given me a chance you got back frm camp, but it was too late. the same thing happen to me last yr and i really wanted to make ammends b4 the same thing hapens,but it was too late. the letter i meant to give you is still in the box wit so many others. i dun want to wish anymore cos it just doesnt come true. thanx for everytin.

to you:
the one who was closest to me 2 wks ago. its been so long since the days we spent together. everytime, after its over you pretend like im a stranger. it hurts but i cannot do anytin cos we resolved and settled everyting before we said our final goodbyes. i'll always rmb wat u say: "wat happens there, stays there..." and i never knew you meant every single word of it. i wish i didnt do wat we did dat night. i wish i didnt agree to it. cos now, its taking a very big toll on me cos after all im someone who clings to memories and good times. its so hard to see you there but its like as if you dun even know me. its as though NOTHING happen but.. we shared so much while it lasted. gave me so much joy and happiness during the days we had. felt so protected, safe, cared, LOVED. i feel damn sad cos its over and your pretence/ignorence which is so bloody damn good. ):