praying

argh.
praying for two things..
1) Band does not suck tmr..
2) (urmm.. cannot be said..)
*hope it comes true..*

niwae, school was alrite..
had to attend remedial cos of amirah..
blardy hell.. but after all, i didn't mind..
the class was full man..
sat beside wei ting..
she full of crappiness..
hehe.. not dat boring lar.
mr wong decided to let me do all the remedial assingnments..
damn.. *toot*
dat will mean more work..
haix.. so stress sia..
i just noe i must pass dis coming test wit flying colours..
ok, maybe not wit flying colours..
but at least pass..?? yeah.. =)
i tink dats all i gotta write..
see him once, twice..
dat's it..

unsaid

bleahs..
cudn't do one damn work for the whole of today.
found out some other things too..
haix.. no more tears to shed..
alot of things was left unsaid..
yup, so i guess, all i gotta do now is
either, wait.. or
forget bout him..
i'm so idiotic..
holding on to a lost hope..
*smacks forehead*
wth.. haix..
enuf said.. nitezz... =(

splittin headache

haix..
ytd, was real confusing..
happy + sad

to him:
i'm really, truly sorry if i bothered u.. i didn't mean to cos i tot u were not readin my blog. niwae, thanx for at least noticing the facts.. i really appreciate it cos dat few msges might be the last.. i'm tryin my best..

s hha tt errd

yeap.. perhaps dats it..
i'm shattered..
let's talk bout ytd..
lessons was boring..
i didn't understand maths..
dat was bad.. real bad.
enrichment was fun wit the exception of sum things.
den,

B A N D.
cool yeah..
tired afta enrichment, still had to go..
so i tot, no mayb we tot
dat it wud be the best cos it was the last..
in the bus, total fun.. real cool..
den "IT" happen..
so who the hell wud accept wat happen ytd?
who the hell wanted wat happen ytd to happen.?
u majors, teachers, SLs tell us..
i realli pity my batch.
almost all were in tears..
including me..
yeah, it was bad..
if wateva happen was true,
den dun expect to my face in the blardy band nimore..
the humiliation ytd was hard to bear..
those who aren't in my position, u wudn't noe..
it just hurtss..
months of hard work all GONE..
yeah, emotions was high..
dunno wat to say nimore..

last time when i was in the edge of giving up on band, der was him to push my spirit, den when he was gone, syf was the only thing dat made my stay in band but now.. der's no more hope to cling on to..

everythings just goin so wrong.. saw u sittin wit her, was like, argh. dun wanna say it.. held back my tears but otw back, den saw u wit her, just cried again.. )))=

haix. thanx, to valerie, jin xiu, shafiq, nicholas, sakinah, guo wei, luqman n esp.
amirul. we didn't deserve dis. wtf.

deep trouble

~whee..!
finally, i haf the time to update..
yaw.. miss typing long entries..
so here goes..

a few thing happen here n der...
dun wanna bother cos it's all so clear dat it ain't my fault..
yeah.. enuf said bout dat..*innocent smile*

ahhh.. i tink i'm gettin over him..
yes, yes finally... (=

to *an.. ur so mean n stuff..
hehe.. just hope we'll be frens n stuff..
yeah.. it's history wit u..
[tink so]

niwae, maths..
algebra rocks but mr wong go damn fast..
wth.. we haven't copy, he start to talk..
he think we superwoman is it..
haiyo.. nvm.. told him already..
hopes he go MUCH MUCH slower..
but he's darn nice lar..
dunno he was like dat..

history.. mr seng's lame n he rawks..!!!
hahhs.. didn't get dat high for history test..
BUT.. i got one of the highest marks 4 source-base questions..
~whee..! yay.. last question onli me n gideon get highest..
yeah.. so proud.. *wide wide grin*
not bragging lar, but just didn't expect it..
sumtimes mr seng also teach like MRT..
so fast.. but nvm.. he so rawks..! yay..! =D

lit.. intresting..
wanna consider dis sub. 4 nxt year..
hehe.. but i tink history is beta..
hehe.. see 1st.. still got looong time.. *starts thinking..* hmm...

science.. mrs. lee so long nvr come..
aiyo.. hope she get well soon..
she so rawks not like the other "act clever" teachers..
she so understand us... hehe..

k, so i tink dat's it..
so happy now days..
jsut waitin for the day i truly, really,
forget him..
dat day i'll rejoice..
yeah..
byezz peeps..

changes

so damn tired..
haix.. lifes change alright..
for gd, for bad, i dunno..
but ain't feelin happy..
maybe i'm the one changing..
oh wells, just dun want anythin bad 2 come frm it..

saw him in skool, tried my best not to care..
manage a lil bit..
must improve for the beta..
yes.. i must... *rolls eyes*

today, didn't go band..
gettin sick of it, seriously..
hahhs.. but musn't slack 2 much..
at least make it thru syf..

so i tink dat's it..
byezz..

lost witout yew

hahahaha..!! ppl laugh..!
yeah.. hehe..
very2 funny day...
kept laughing the whole day...
hahahahahahaha..!!!
k, so dat shall summarise my day..

still wishin yeah..

byezz..

u shud let me love yew...

stress

haix..
supposedly suppose to do my homeec project..
but i dun haf my home ec bk..
so basically i haven't done any hmwk..
*sigh* wat is becoming of me..?
niwae, talk to alot of ppl..
alot of ppl havin probs, including me..
bleahs.. pls, pls, pls...
i wanna forget him..
cos he's happy now...
hey, who's not..
i'll be too if i'm in his shoes..
dunno wat to write nimore suddenly..
wonder if all dis helping him is worth the cost..
k lah, of to do the rest of my hmwk..
byezz..

truth is..
i never got over u..
wish i was standing in her shoes..

wishes n dreams

dunno y suddenly so down..
bleahs.. band was ok..
went to SCH got Zhonghua..
thier choice piece got eupho solo..
cool man their players..
but unfortunately, dey cudn't play our piece..
hahax...!

back to wishes n dreams..
haix.. do dey really come true..?
alot of times i tell myself dat i MUST forget him..
but y...?? alot of ppl say no use remembering him..
do u tink i want to rmb someone who haf hurt me alot..??
obviously no rite.. it's just me..
i try to force myself but y i still can't..
i've tried everythin can to get things back to normal..
but u just simply DUN CARE..
yeah, so i realise dat.. but still i can't let go..
i've given up impressing u..
i've given up other chances cos of u..
but if der's one thing, i haf not..
is dat i've not given up praying n wishing dat u come back into my life..
yes.. i tink of u 24/7.. every time..
but it's like effortless..
i find myself real stoopid, if u know, u'll find me stupid too..
but y..?? but do i want to look stupid..??
no, never.. i'm so lost without u...
i keep to trying to find ways, but no answers...
it just hurts me alot when i see ur face..
to still like someone who haf hurt me tons of times..
i just want u back.. pls..
gonna stop here..
enuf said..
byezz..

I thought I had all the answers never giving in
But baby since you've gone I admit that I was wrong

All I know is I'm lost without you I'm not gonna lie
How my going to be strong without you I need you by my side
If we ever say we'll never be together and we ended with goodbye
don't know what I'd do ...
I'm lost without youI keep trying to find my way but all I know is
I'm lost without youI keep trying to face the day
I'm lost without you

How my ever gonna get rid of these blues
Baby I'm so lonely all the time
Everywhere I go I get so confused
You're the only thing that's on my mind
Oh my beds so cold at night and I miss you more each day
Only you can make it right no I'm not too proud to say

All I know is I'm lost without you I'm not gonna lie
How my going to be strong without you I need you by my side
If we ever say we'll never be together and we ended with goodbye
don't know what I'd do ...
I'm lost without youI keep trying to find my way but all I know is
I'm lost without youI keep trying to face the day
I'm lost without you

If I could only hold you now and make the pain just go away
Can't stop the tears from running down my face...

lyrics frm the song: Lost Without You

failures

bleahs..
MATHS TEST
I'M DOOM..!
confirm fail.. no use regrettin..
the last question, just fail to see wat the question mean..
hate maths man.. damn it..
downloading songs now.. for him..
he owes me BIG TIME man..!!! *ebil grins*
haha.. almost addicted to rock socks..
real nice man the guitar solos..!!
niwae, notin much happen dis few days..
house games fever goin everywhere..
honestly, i cudn't be botheres a single bit..
bleahs.. i tink dat's it..
forget wat to write..
wanna watch dat APM thingy..
wanna go SCH tmr.. PLS dad...!!!
dunno wat got into my dad's head..
he blew up today.. haix..
byezz..

luv urself

sick n tired

yep, as the tittle suggests..
i'm sick n tired..
1stly, DAMN the Singtel Company...!
oh wells.. maybe not thier fault.
but how was i suppose to noe how they count my blardy bill..??!!
arghx..! now i've to pay $5 xtra cos of them, n my father simply REFUSE to pay those bills CLAIMING dat its not his fault...
HELLO....!! Was it mine..??!! dotzz..
so everythin's on me n who is IRRESPONSIBLE now..??
ME..! yeah, wadeva.. =(
niwae, didn't go skool today...
woke n my joints n muscles was aching like mad..
cudn't move sia..
my spine was like breaking at every move i made..
so decided not to go skool...
i'm enjoyin the benefits niwae.. =p
hate wednesdays..
niwae, ytd... was real boring..
P.E had to do the 2.4 run..
wth.. dat's one of the reasons my muscles are aching..
blardy hell.. damn dat old man.. =x
den during history, ching kit go n play a prank on me..
hahakzz.. he go n put a plastic cockroach in his hist. txtbk den past to me..
wth.. den i open the book n when i open it, i jump out of my sit.. paisey sia..
lucky it was mr seng's lessons..
den ching kit had to say "i luv cockroach" 10 times.. ((=
wahahx..! serve him rite for playin dat trick on me..
den afta skool, celebrate Liyana's b'dae..
~whee...! surprised her wit flour n water...
fun liao.. HAPPY B'DAE GAL..!! =D
now.. on sadder note..
*sniff.. sniff..*
just read thru all my previous entries..
almost cried sia thinkin of wat we been thru..
wish it was still wat it was..
dunno y i can't forget him..
everytime see him, den feelings so overwhelmin..
but hafta keep quiet cos gotta be strong infront of my frens...
see him ytd.. haix..
dun wanna say it..
k, lah.. stop here..
byezz.. ppl.

v'dae

nice, nice, nice day..!
~whee....! let's start frm the beginning..
lessons were utterly boring..
bleahs.. feel so bad bout sometin..
niwae, assembly was darn crappy..
teachers in swiss are so LAME..
wahahax..! had house meeting but me, amirah n ain lied n say we got hmt..
hahhs.. bad huh..?? i can't beleive amirah agree..
k, so hmt.. did dat stoopid compo..
didn't see his bro..wth.. hahhs..
den, went to causeway..
arhgx..! loads of sad stories happen..
mad, him at causeway.. wth. saw him wit 2 gals..
paisey sia, cos me cry on the spot de..
wa liao.. den ask fathin to pass the prezie..
his frns called den say he was also abt 2 cry...
i was like omg...! wth..! dun cry dear.. T_T
den afta dat talk wit him, settle things.. =)
den he pass me his prezie..
~whee..! so nice.. wish i didn't lose my temper just now..
hahhs.. but wth.. everythin was alrite..
walk back wit he n his frens..
feel so low standard sia..
his frens n him are a handsome bunch..
den, yar.. walk2, den talk to him b4 goin back..
he's so luvable.. n luv him loads lar..! =D
so dat's it.. ppl tag yaw...
so empty tagboard.. hahhs..
n, HAPPY V'DAE yar...! ;)
byezz. peeps..

un-depressed

wat a nice day..
got the dung-dung-cheng thingy outside my house..
aiyo.. cannot do hmwk..
so re-edit my entry again..
in the morning, was 1 hr late for religious class..
dotzz.. the bus breakdown sia..
den afta dat, went to causeway
wait my ever beloved fren, aisyah...
she finally bought a gift for her darlin..
all thanx to me..! wahahax..!
den went back, house all to maself..
wee.. chat wit him for awhile bout tmr..
yay...! now i noe wat to do tmr..
n for gdness sake, he's one hell of a sweet guy..!
~weetss..! hahax..
den, let's see.. watch Home Alone..
nice sia, cos i'm also alone at home..
hahhs.. den afta dat, my family come back..
so noisy sia.. nag n nag..
so i tink dat's my day...
niwae,
HAPPY B'DAE TO AZIMAH...!!!
she's finally 15.. hahhs..
byezz peeps...

i tink bout it over n over again..
cos it's all in my head..
n i can't take it, i can't shake it..
i tink bout it over n over again..
i keep picturing u n her...
n it's hurts so bad, i can'take it..

exhausted-drained

scratch the previous entry cos now i'm darn bored n i wanna write a loong one to pls muaself... hahahaha.. 3...2...1... begin..

so tired.
my legs killin me.. my muscles aren't pls wit me now.. boohoo..
almost unable to walk just now went i woke up..
wth.. wth...
went to causeway..
bought a real nice thing for him..
so proud of maself..
hehhhs.. can't wait to gif him on
V'DAE..! yay...
wat we'll he get for me..??
*scratch forehead*
just watch mighty morphin power ranger.
whee..
coool sia.. i love black ranger..
*drools* -darn cute..!
bitchy-bitch-bitchiness
all around me..
not me, but some ppl..
sape yg terase, sorry eh... =p hahhs..
lastly, wanna noe sometin..??
i still do like him... =D yay..!
n i luv my life..!
haiz.. wth i'm talkin about..
let's just see it as i'm so tired.. n i've started crappin..
wth.. end here..
byezz peeps...

Helo..
so tired. just came back frm eatin out.. so full man.. school was a stressing day. bleahs. dun wanna talk bout it. blardy damn bitch.. so sick of u man.. niwaes, afta skool went to JP.. bought my famous amos stuff.. so rich huh..?? niwae, found the perfect gift.. cool lar.. i'm so fierce dis days.. PMS? hahhs.. i tink dat's it.. real bored now.. how i wish..................... argh.. dun wanna say it..
Byezz..

i'm really gettin sick.

Helo..
so tired. met azimah den went to skool 4 the istana performance. cool man dat thing. played for everyone. alot of swiss peeps der. den saw wei chang.. wanted to say hi to him but scared later he cannot recognize me.. hahhs.. cool man.. march frm everywhere.. real fun.. den went back, eat at McD.. so full.. den went back wit azimah, shafiq n yan.. so bored sia now. wanna sleep cos my body aching all over but hmwk like mountain like dat.. haix.. k so i tink dat's it for today..
byezz..

i'm gettin sick.. =(

Helo..
haish. wake up so darn early today.. had breakfast we my dad, mum n grandad. Hmm.. Family reunion..? hahhs.. k den watch tv.. watch The Oprah Windfrey show.. sianzz. was about children becoming sex slaves.. pity dem sia.. just discuss dat topic durin eng lessons.. almost cried.. really pity those kids.. gals as young as 12 have children already... omg.. so bad... May those who do this to them get hit by the lightning n den run down by a lorry.. =x seriously pity them.. k den went to hospital to visit my granny.. she look so sick.. i never wanna get sick man.. ish.. den went back so now i'm home. my hp is so silent.. y must his hp get lost..?? n y didn't i ans his call when he call me ytd..?? n y can't he call me today..?? haix.. hafto wait for tmr.. haix.. n i'm gettin sick soon.. wish history can repeat itself.. haix.. k lah... i end of here. wanna finish up all my hmwk b4 tmr..(although i noe i can nvr will.. wahahax..)
Byezz.

ps: i hate discrimination..! =D *lol*

Hi..
argh. wat happen..? lesons as usual. den band. thanx to all my frens dat were waitin for me for so long.. Thanx yaww.. hahhs.. K so let see, den went to wdls, ate at KFC den search for a perfect prezie for him n look for cards for v'dae.. we're so enthu bout it.. hahhs.. went to McD den library.. realli enjoyed the time out wit ma frens. Den met my sis, she looks so belo wit my jeans.. wahahax. N fathin, farid is one sweet guy.. bleahs.. K so den went home n now i just wanna say dis:
1) f*ck f*ck f*ck f*ck f*ck..! Prefer not to talk bout it. Fullstop.
2) he's sweet n cute. so i shall luv him wit all my heart.
3) help me to move on. PLS!

Lastly:
I LUV HIM LOADS! yeah.. *muackz*
Byezz...

i luv u. yes i do.
until the end of time.

Helo..
So bored.. No mood to the my hmwk cos i really, truely happy now.. Luv him loads.. Let me tell u guys dis story..

One day, yeah, one fine day, i woke up to a beautiful morning. Yes, beautiful but i was so sad. I was hit the reality of facts just the nite b4. Wat can i do, wat can i say. He's "D" guy, n i was just the gal. Me, stupid enuf to let him noe my feelings but ended up gettin hurt. Den 1 day, a guy comes n she refuses to like him cos he's just some1 who u tot was a normal fren n the fact dat she knew dat the guy dat she luved before cun neva be forgetten. wat can ever overcome luv rite..? Yeah, n so the story goes, the guy continued the like her n the gal continued to like "D" guy. But one fine day, when she began to accept facts, she realise a part of her life was wasted on someone she knew she cud neva haf. At dat period she had fail to see things dat was infront of her eyes. She regretted too far on the close door n fail to see the one opening. When she finally moved on, she was happy der, cos der, she learnt wat it was like to be loved n the meaning of luving someone. She regretted not goin to dat door earlier but now she was happy. Happy like in a fairytale. A happy ending.

K, so dat's it. Confusing story rite..? Nvm.. Just wanna say dat i've moved on learn to live wit the facts. hey, he got one damn nice gal n i'm happy for him. Like some1 ever said, "Let nature takes its course". wahahax. N yeah, learnt loads of lesson durin dat period n gotta thank him for all dis. Yep.. So dat's it.. ;)
Byez...

Hi..
So bored.. Just came back frm my religious class.. So boring.. Wanna complete all the overdue assingments todae.. Bleahs... Feel so stupid n useless dis days... Alot of b'daes comin.. $BrOkE$ Hahhs.. Listening to Never be replaced by 1st lady thru naseha's blog cos unable to download the song frm IRC... Dotzz.. Haix.. Der's just sometin dat i cling to dat make me unable to forget bout him but i duno wat.. Haix.. K lah.. Off to doin my ton of hmwk..
Byezzz... =

From the day i met you i knew we'd be together
And now i know i wanna be with you forever
I wanna marry you and i wanna have your kids
Thinking never compared to the feeling of your kisses

I could say im truly happy till this day
You make me think i better live my life everyday
Theres never been a doubt in my mind
That i regret ever having you by my side

But if the day comes that i have to let you go
I think theres somethin i should probably let you know
That everyday that i've spent with you
I will miss you cause im happy that i had you at all

Baby i love you and ill never let you go
But if i have to boy i think that you should know
All the love we made can never be erased
And i promise you that you will never be replaced

Part of lyrics of Never Be Replaced...

Helo ppl..
Yep, i noe i haven't been loyal to ma blog.. Not free lar dis days... Let me write one loooong entry so i can skip the next few days... so on thurs had remedial den went to guillin.. Long time nvr go der sia.. Den afta dat dis n dat happened... Fun lar.. On friday.. Wat happened...? Oh yar..! Dat blardy enrichment.. So damn embarassing... Was giggling like mad ppl.. Den sumore next wk doin it at da basketball court... Den band, some things happen den yar dat's it.. Same story lar.. Today, met azimah den met shafiq den met the rest... n den durin band was so fun cos btw, i'm performing at the Istana... whee... Didn't march todae.. Den at 11 we went out den went to eat at mac.. Wah, dat shafiq loaded sia.. He treat 4 ppl at one go.. Cool man.. Den talk to him bout somethin, was so shock sia.. Haha.. Den went of for the CIP thing.. Went to Buona Vista, den Queestown den Clementi den Jurong.. Wah. Soo tired u noe.. Singaporeans are real funny ppl.. I hate dose parents who ask thier children not to donate cos their wallets was not easily accsecible... wth.. Den there were some who already train thier children to say no to us... Haix.. Wat lar.. N den there i those which i salute cos dey took the time to put down their bags n search for thier wallets n den der was still some which took time to gif advices n well wishes.. Was a great experience though... All in all, it was a darn tiring day... Afta CIP went to IMM rest n eat a lil bit.. Den went home... So dat's it.. I am so happy today bcos of one small lil thing.. Yes.. So happy... Dat's it lar.. N i'm changing my blog song to a malay song.. =D
Byezzz...

Hi..
Yes.. Feel so relaxed.. Haha.. Finish watchin Anger Mangement n Fiesta Komedi... Anger Mangement such a farny n very romantic story.. Wheee... Long time nvr watch movie wit someone alone.. Maybe durin v'dae someone will just come along n ask me out... hahahahahahaha... Wat a lame fantasy.. wth am i talkin abt... My hmwk still haven't finish... Haha... Mind went blank straight away afta talkin to him just now.. haha... Durin hmt, was so bored but manage to joke ard wit the teacher.. Our class is so like terbabas pat tingkat 4.. So isolated... N yar, did i mention i saw his bro again.. Den someting funny happen... lol.. K lah, i tink dat's my day... Off to doin hmwk...
Byezz..

May Mrs Lee get well soon cos i dun like Mr Ang teaching our class.. He's so demanding...!!! Arghh... =)

Helo..
Notin great happen today... Got back my maths test.. Haix, dun wanna talk bout it... Was a boring n "pissed" mode today... So many bitches appear in my school today... Wat to do... Dey just can't get intrested into their on life... N yar, two-faced idiots too are beginning to appear... Den durin mt lesson, oyt of sooo many ppl, he appear.. wth.. My frens was like staring at me... wth... haha.. Durin band, had a fun time wit my junior.. He's so giggly.. It's gd cos i won't get too stress wit him if he can't play but too giggly will sumtimes mean dat he won't take me seriously.. But he's gd.. Yeahs... Den went going back home, it was so damn obvious dat, dat "bitch' was tryin to flirt again.. Yuckss...! Disgusted... It was all so obvious.. Even azimah agrees wit me... Blardy damn bitch... Wat else yar...? N yar, no communication, notin between us... Haix.. Y? Niwaes, went back wit azimah.. Went walk2 at causeway den went back.. So dat's my day...
Byezz...